VALUING SELF OR SELF ABSORBED?

We lived in our last house for decades. We loved the house and found it a wonderful place to raise our children. Everyone has fond memories of the house. However, there were projects I had always wanted to do but were never accomplished until it was time to get our home in saleable shape; such as putting in new windows. Our old windows were not air tight and would allow moisture to seep in. This was a problem in the winter when the moisture froze. It was also a problem in the heat of the summer when air came through the cracks. We also decided to paint and remove wallpaper for the sale. Much needed but put off for so many years.

When ever we went to visit my in-laws we would find my father-in-law working hard to finish a project before we got there. The same would be true of my mother-in-law. She would we preparing a dish from a recipe that she had wanted to prepare but waited until company came. I found my husband doing the same one day. Working hard to finish a project started at the last minute.

Now you’re probably thinking I am having some random thoughts. But they are both examples of doing for others what we really want for ourselves. I have wondered why we are that way. Is this a way of feeling that we are being Godly and denying ourselves worldly pleasure? When it’s for others  are we then justified in getting that which we need or want? Why can’t we value who we are and feel that if something needs to be done we can do it for us? There is a difference between being self absorbed and meeting our own needs. One doesn’t care about others and how what we are doing affects those around us. The other realizes the need to care for our surroundings and personal needs. Learning to value self is an art.

This week we have been working on our deck and yard. It waited until our company left. I don’t think it mattered at all to our company that we needed to weed the flower bed and paint the deck. I think they enjoyed visiting with us late into the evening. If we had worked hard to get the house perfect for their visit then we would have been too tired to visit. Now we have the memories of the visit and our yard is being cared for too. This is the best of both worlds.