A HAPPY STATE

I read about a study showing those who live together are happier than those who are married. I have been pondering this and have a lot of thoughts. Living with someone one you love can be a happy state. Fearing I might talk someone into skipping the ceremony I will not go into all the reasons but I can see how anyone could make an argument for living with someone without getting married. There is a fact that was left out of this study, however. If you live with someone you are at high risk for breaking up. Even more important if you marry someone you have lived with first your chances of divorcing that individual is 75% or higher. Another way of saying it, this is a temporary state.  So if your goal is just be in a state of happiness then go for living with the person you fall in love with, moving on when you are no longer happy.

Since I have been married for 43 years I would like to say something about that state that is not quite as happy and I’m not talking about one of the lower 48. What I have discovered about life is you are not always happy. I remember when Kent was working 16 hour days, 6 days a week and we had 3 young children who it seemed were sick most of the time. I will go on record in saying I was not happy. I loved my children and husband. I believed in what I was doing. I felt that the future would get better and it did. Kent and I believed in being civil and kind to each other which got us through the tough times. With the strong foundation we started with we never questioned the importance of being married. Now we can look back and smile at those times, realizing that our love was always there. Happiness just wasn’t the most important thing.

What I know, is happiness is nothing compared to the joy that comes to a loving couple who are committed to each other and in it for the long haul. Something those who live together will never know.

P.S. I am happy!

COMPARISON

I heard someone say, “There’s no pride in being what you are but in what you do with it.” I have thought a lot about this statement. As a school child I was intimidated by those who were so very intelligent. As a mother I was in awe of those who were knowledgeable in every situation. At church there were brilliant scriptorians. And so the list goes. I saw only my limits.

Today, as a 60+ year-old I realize that I have great intelligence but I have dyslexia. I haven’t allowed my handicap keep me from graduating with a master’s degree and having a successful counseling practice. By taking classes and workshops I became the mother I wanted to be. I have read the scriptures daily and studied inspired writings for decades. I now know more than I ever thought possible.

There are things I wish I had learned or tried doing but for the most part I am happy with what I have accomplished with my life. If I have learned anything about living it is by small but consistent effort that great changes come. I also believe what I read by Hugh B. Brown, “You can do anything you want. You just can’t do everything you want.”

FAMILY

My niece's husband has made/directed a movie that will be out in February (the 24th I think is the exact date). We have seen the behind the scene pictures of him at work now there is a trailer. I'm not really into the geek experience but since I'm family I will go. I hope you enjoy the trailer. http://youtu.be/_V7BZy-dCyc?hd=1

JANUARY GOALS

As January gets into full swing many people are trying to live up to the goals set weeks earlier. I don’t set goals in January. I feel January goals are in reality a list of chastisements that guilt us into correcting our perceived bad behavior. Punishment for not being perfect might be a better description for January goals.

I think January is a time for fighting the winter blues. Maybe reading the books received for Christmas or cleaning out the sweets treats given by friends. I know I have a box of gourmet chocolates I’m willing to give anyone who hasn’t gone into a diabetic coma.

Do I believe in improving? Yes, but not by negative means. I need encouragement for me to make changes. I like to challenge and reward myself for what I accomplish. I want to measure success in small increments not in an end result. You see, I will always be a work in progress.

ANOTHER CHANGE

As I endeavor to find myself in my blog I am comforted by the words “to live a creative life we must lose our fear of being wrong” (JC Pearce).  I have found that the need to post my creative endeavors only make me less creative. When my cards don’t reflect the colors I’ve created or when I feel the pressure to post something I get discouraged.  So, I have decided it is time to change the blog again. I think that it will be a work in progress for some time but none the less I will begin posting again.

So in an effort to being my blog again I would like to remind any readers that are still out there that January 7 is National Old Rock Day. So while I try to decide what to post next I will just post an old rock photographed by Kent.